I want every page I write to be fresh, a new world to itself and me, I want to be surprised and sometimes very disgusted by what I write I have moved from straight genre sci fi to a messy metaphysical melting pot. From nihilism to meaning and every now and then back again I got up in the other night in the middle of the night to write a story I loved at midnight but found quite dull when I was also me at 10am in the morning. But in the end it was a disjointed story of allegories for life on another planet, strange physical intimacies that make you squirm, and a character who can't go to sleep yet because she needs to eat another orange. I wish to become the avant-garde writer of your waking nightmares. I already am. A nightmare writer but occasionally something really good comes out that someone else might love. As long as I love and commit to every word I write that really is all that matters. Every word can't be wonderful. It needs to be jagged and messy and inc
Finishing Einstein's work. At last.